| Blogs > starwomyn > un·a·pol·o·get·ically STAR!!! |
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Altercation and Amends to My Sister Dear Sis: I thank you for the hospitality that you show me when I was in Arkansas. I am sure that you are aware that I have been involved with a 12 Step Program for a number of years. One of the things we learn is taking responsibility for our own mistakes. We were all trying to deal with our Brother's Death to the best of our ability. My best was dealing with it in spiritual terms and be assured that he would okay with the transition that we all must eventually make. I don't know what your agenda was for saying what you said but my mistake was feeling hurt and reacting to it. For that I apologize. I was told that you were offended by the term "crossing over." This is a Native American Term. I have been a member of the Native American Community for a number of years. I have participated in Sweat Lodge Ceremonies, gone to Pow Wow's and other Native American Gathering. I am personally more comfortable using that term than some of the other phases. Certainly, the term "Crossing Over" is no more offensive than "Dang Bro, Am I going to have to use that Dr. Pepper bottle to hold your cremated remains!." I would be horrified if someone said that to me when I was on my deathbed. I also heard stories of rumors being circulated in the family that I am a Crazed Satanist, doing strange rituals and putting spells on people. This is totally untrue. I don't even believe in Satan. I do believe in Good and Evil but we are all God's . Most folks are evolving in the direction of Good. I am certainly not the first alcoholic to have problems with the "Hell Fire Damnation" Concept of God. Nevertheless, My Spirituality is something that I take VERY seriously. I would have never been able to maintain almost 30 years of sobriety if I did not have a working relationship with my Higher Power. Step 3 Made a decision to turn our will and our lives our to the care of God as we understood Him. quoted by the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous So I think outside the box when it comes to God. I don't need some preacher on the pulpit to define God for me. No one religion has an excursive on God. What is important is to seek God, The path we use to find him is secondary. Nevertheless, the horror stories circulating about me have absolutely no validity. Step Eight and Nine have to do with clearing out negative energy and airing grievances respectfully. This is what I am attempting to do. You are quite correct in stating that I don't have a clue about your life. You don't have a clue about my life either. Our lives have evolved to the yearly Christmas Card exchange. Namaste! Sis  Abracadabra  |
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7/18/2007 12:18 am |
You can choose your friends but you cannot choose your relatives. I have a sister who put me thru hell trying to guilt me the day our mother died and I shut the door on her for years after that, she is the one I learned that if I had a cancer I would cut it out, same with poisonous cancerous family or friends. "If they do not enhance your life, Cut them out of your life. But you can choose your sister/friends Hope you choose me as one!
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7/18/2007 12:26 am |
I have 2 sisters and each of us have different views on religion but we respect each other for our different life styles and even though we do not spend a lot of time together the sisterly love is still there. I hope that your sister reads your letter as this will help her understand you better. Don't listen to the rumors...they are usually started out of spite or jealousy. I pray that you and your sister work through the grief of a lost brother together and become closer in the weeks ahead. Best wishes to you both Pen
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7/18/2007 5:50 am |
Beautifully written Star. I understand the rifts that come between family members and know the ache you feel. You have done what needed to be done. Now move on and fill that void with the things that bring peace, love and joy to you. The heartache will ease with time. "I may not do great things, but I can do small things with great love." Mother Theresa 
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