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Senior Friend Finder?
Posted:Feb 22, 2022 3:03 pm
Last Updated:Sep 8, 2022 8:48 pm
1870 Views

Recipes, gardening, , grandkids, - spouse, what state and where we live, past vacations, weather today versus yesterday, the present health status and what is scheduled with the doctor, projects around the house, the incredible new pot and pan set that everyone should be aware of, Covid restrictions and feeling more comfortable ordering grocery food for delivery, what programs do you watch on television?, is your computer an HP computer?, how about phone apps and what kind of phone and phone plan to you have, which are your most favorite, do your feet hurt after a full day? Am I on [answer is a definitive “No” by the way with no intent to share in there]

Yes, yes, yes…. I agree that to a certain degree some of the above will and should be in probably every shared message from day-to-day. However, is that the complete list? [yeah, I know I am skipping over a lot of others that could be listed, however my point is…. are the above ALL THAT WE can and will discuss in SFF….is this ALL that Seniors are concerned with?]

I also take into account that a number of ladies who I write to and those that respond to my profile are looking only for some degree of engagement of discourse? But? Where is that discourse if they choose to inherently say "Hi" and the virtual "Bye" seemingly in the same breath? Of course I am NOT aware of the numbers in "here" who are NOT looking for other than a pastime to jump in SFF....look, reply when they feel the urge, then leave. I can pay more attention to their profiles that state their attachment...married, widowed, single and the like. However, should that matter in a site that promotes that of Senior-aged Friends seeking other Seniors?

I shake my head as I am still confused with it all and I have been a member now for what?...maybe a month. Yeah, I know.... give it some more time? Time will heal all?

Let me get back to the messages received for a wee bit.....

I take it that the too-few things that I/we covered in those first few very short exchanged messages were enough to make that Senior Friend connection a success. All is good…time to move on?

Let’s mention the above “things.” I really, really believe that I have read all of the above, and then some, in the form of a joke I received about a year ago from my female cousin who resides in Florida.

It seems like within this site, all of my fears about aging have come to roost! Ya got me runnin’ scared! Has most of the female to male attraction issues been supplanted by day-to-day routine life now? Is anyone a romantic anymore and feeling that their life is more than a “glass half-full,” that it is in fact “spilling over?” Is the concept that “some of the best times of my life will happen now” obsolete? It is my contention that nothing should be “dead and buried” until it’s rightful time to be. Gosh! I am understandably perplexed here!

I need to look again for the name of the site I am in right now. Looks like I am in a website called Senior Friend Finder. Is that correct? I guess I expected something else that older Seniors were still interested and involved in? My experiences in SFF so far are this: yes, a few nicely written and exchanged messages go back and forth at the start. Barely a few of these messages from the ladies are longer that a few sentences in length. Then, IF….IF I even obtain a response from my initial communications, the same occurs, a few sentences in length and again saying very in content. Same when a lady messages me, tis but a few shared messages back and forth saying “Hi, how are you?” and a few other introductory things. Then…POOF! Very few are going much past the introductions???? Yowza!!!!

Do I have the wrong site? Can it be that this is the “norm” for older ladies and gents above 60? I know and expect that ALL OF THE ABOVE routine daily life stuff are part and parcel to the “getting to know someone” aspect of a new friendship. I expect that to a certain extent. Once the weather is discussed and where we both are living now and for how long….. is that all there is to it? Is the friendship completed and thus the need then to “move on?” If there is a working handbook that you can point to for navigating through this for success? If so, please suggest it.

However, if someone knows the answer to what about the short-lived aspects of these new connections in here? Is life that fickle now? Is the “grass is greener” concept in play for most seniors in SFF? Is the overriding mindset amongst the older set that the very next contact will be “the one?”

Can anyone suggest a website that is populated with older ladies that really, really want to be friends and meet? I am all ears! Welllll being honest, that is not the case. But, maybe that subject is unacceptable to discuss in "here."

I will have to check in Barnes & Nobel tomorrow in the physics area. I seem to recall a law of electrostatics that must have been removed.... "opposites attract." That used to pertain to men and women? I joined SFF not to disprove the law...no, I desired to prove it's merit.

My add on 25 February as I come in here again...... I suspected that the above would get some "flack" from people. Not flack pertaining to my specific results in "here" but more to reinforce the fact that the site is called Senior Friend Finder and that can mean a non gender liking to come in "here" to just "be a friend." Yes, I know that...... everyone can and does use this site to be what they desire it to be. Perchance for two ladies to meet often and share recipes, book choices, parenting tips, whatever. Be the communications male to male, male to female, female to male....whatever. Yes, I am very much aware of the possibilities that could evolve from being in "here."

My history in here though is showing that once the connections are made, they are not given the time and effort to survive and prosper. I would hope that I can be involved with some "friendships" that more than a few exchanged communications. To give the friendship a chance.
2 Comments
Talk to Me!!!
Posted:Feb 8, 2022 12:44 pm
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2022 7:43 pm
1911 Views

Back In The Day…..

After WWII, our GIs returned stateside invested their saved and obtained veteran sponsored loans to purchase their own homes and Harleys, cars and the advent of lots of other technological advancements post war. And as if by chance in those years following the war, there was also the advent of the low-cost ranch style home and suburb living developments including the roads, stores, schools that needed to be there for all of the new housing. Often credited to William J. Levitt. I am thinking you can remember a bit about that time and what was soon to happen throughout the United States.

Bill Levitt started such Levittown developments. The first on Long Island for Levittown, New York. Then, in Levittown, Pennsylvania began in 52. The homes offered affordable housing with low down payments. The working population was now seeking to get away from the high density city superstructures and have their “own piece of land.”

Throughout the nation suburbs would pop up with all of the amenities now being offered miles and miles away from the city from which the workers were traveling to and from for their employment. In some instances, the larger companies were providing can shuttle to and from work so that people could “car ” and save as often the companies offered the shuttle as a perk for employment.

Now, out in Los Angeles, as an example. You can remember over time as you read or heard the news if you did not in fact live in or around L.A., that the freeways and traffic there has always been very slow with long traffic jams everywhere.

Depending on the suburb, you could be 60 miles or more from your work in the city. With delays, a trip to work could take 3 hours times each way! So, the car would often start at 5am and the shuttle would not get back “home” in their suburban development until well into that evening. To be sure, a very long day…to get to work for work and then the shuttle back.

A aside here to add a fact I will get back to on the subject of “suburban living.” Bear with me here….Statistics in the 60s provided a shocking fact. That, on average a married couple did not devote more than fifteen minutes of all-important, open, honest, sit-down level of heart-to-heart “you and me” communication in a day’s time. When I heard that from that incredible professor in my university Courtship & Marriage class, I, and I would guess all of the other students were dumbfounded and an energetic discussion ensued right after this cold fact was divulged to us.

“You mean to say…. couples do not take the interest and the time daily to devote to sitting down and getting to know each other?” Adding….and all other that you can infer that you would get from a desired open and honest communication to truly delve into each other’s personal desires, hopes, fears, family life and all else???? To that of truly being a partner and wanting to share in your combined lifescape.

Nope. The answer was one word….. “No!”

The average couple spent less than fifteen minutes in conversing with their spouse on a daily basis. Adding to that injury, most of that was geared to the very simplistic … “gosh, traffic was brutal today…saw accidents on the way!” and ditto, ditto, ditto as they passed very simplistic comments in passing as the day ended and then they were off to bed and the start of the new day in the morning.
It was then no surprise when the professor added the following to this already shocking story…. That in the shuttle drive to and from work…. The men and women paired together in those shuttle vans were communicating more with their co-workers than their own spouses on the drive.

The result? There occurred an over-abundance of divorces from their initial spouses….and then relationships and marriages amongst the shuttle shared co-workers of the opposite sex. Studies showed, that the close quarters in the shuttle vans forced communication by proximity and those parties were getting to know more about each other. Better and more honest communication than that which they were partaking in with their own spouses.

Lessons learned from the above? About the continued need for complete, open, honest communication to always be present in your cherished relationships.
In full disclosure, I myself place open and honest communication as the top priority in the establishment of a profound relationship. I talk….A LOT! I never had a state fair job where I was the one who “reads minds.” Sorry, not a skill that I have. I need to “ask,” I need to “talk,” I need to “explain and question” when the need arises. Trust me, that is daily and often! Oh well!
1 comment
How about a War!
Posted:Feb 7, 2022 7:35 pm
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2022 3:35 pm
2162 Views

Did you know….. that at any point in time, there are to wars being waged around the globe? Most of these “wars” will be local conflicts in that part of the world which will not make international news. Furthermore, those smaller conflicts will probably not affect you, or me, in any way whatsoever. However, if a war is waged amongst larger nations with global implications....much different complexion and end result which could affect our economy, our citizens working there, or more.

Now, ask yourself what could possibly be the cause of all wars being fought? Would you be surprised to learn that it is on of or more of very distinct factors? Can you guess what these main factors that are the cause of all wars could possibly be?

Give ?.... Okay, I will lend a hand in this….
Way back to the dawn of man on earth, the tribes that inhabited the landscape however stark and severe to survive on as it was back then often needed more women to procreate and be the gatherers. They also needed more men to both protect the tribe in struggles and fights for survival. They also were hinters so for the tribe could eat and survive to live another day. A “war” would be waged for this first cause of war….. let’s call it “sex.”

Lets move on to the second cause for war. Politics. , tribe, country not approving another or country’s political philosophies. The warring factions believe their way of life is the “right .”

Finally, religion is the third reason. Once again, not being able to accept another country’s religious doctrine. Yes, wars have been fought over the ages to impose a certain religion on other parts of the globe, into other countries.

Sex, politics, religion. The reason of all major wars ever fought.
So.... what might we feel that this present struggle over Ukraine is all about? Its of those .
4 Comments
Back in the 50s....
Posted:Feb 7, 2022 12:07 pm
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2022 3:40 pm
2330 Views

Without a doubt. The very best university course I ever took was not even in my career field! Ironic! The course was of my electives to give me some "breathing space" amidst the heavily technical and all-important coursework that my curriculum demanded. I found the class to be the perfect deflection from my challenging coursework.

By sheer accident, when I first arrived in the state and on campus to attend "summer school" to help decrease my fall class demand.... I was quickly informed that the remaining "seats" in this particular class was unheard of and that I had better of them as this was a surprise to not having been filled by then.

It was a sociology course named Courtship & Marriage and was taught by a world-renowned expert who was blind and had to be escorted to class each day by his dog. Incredible course! The very best I ever took and in taking that course it gave me understandable pause in wondering if sociology might be a better fit for my inquisitive mind.

Anyway.... I loved the class, as did all the other students, as this professor and his several courses ranked as the most in demand courses at the university. Enough of the accolades for the professor and the course, now on to the point I am taking forever to get to.....

I did come away from this course with several very poignant facts and figures that were formative to me and my perspective towards social life. Other facts were simply neat to hear and be aware of.

Take this ..... back in the 50s, life was a "front porch" society where families sat outside on their porches in the early evening hours to enjoy the cooler night air and to "visit" with neighbors as they walked about around their homes. So, if you were to take a few block walk around the neighborhood around your family's home..... there was about a 90% chance you would pass/"See" your future intended while taking your post-supper walk.

Just think of that. Think of that as compared to how accessible the whole world is to us nowadays. In a second ....we can an e- instead of what what used to be a "snail " letter that usually took days and sometimes did not even reach it's desired destination.

Instead of a phone booth you had to stand in at the corner and pump quarters, dimes and nickels into to make a call, or a fixed dial telephone at home..... you have a high tech cell phone that can do soooo much. Phones are computers, cameras, encyclopedias, flashlights, and have a wealth of features that I do not want to even delve into as I might be forever hooked. In full disclosure, I have never had the urge to get into , , and all of the other cell social areas. My loss? I do not feel that way.

Back in the 50s, what was flight like with commercial airlines compared to what it is now?

I am certain you can add so much more about how our lives have changed year by year since we were much younger. And you ladies can certainly add to what present day improvements have done in your lives.

Now back to the point about the ability to more easily "communicate and connect" with others. Would you argue or agree that we can all use very dear friends in our lives. Hopefully we have some very dear friendships close by in our lives. Friends we see and deal with daily, often and local.

What of friendships that span a sizable distance from where we are? Away from where we "live?" What of the contacts and yes, incredible friendships that could occur if..... if we expanded our sphere of distance? Yup, I am certain that as we come into SFF as we do, and after we have attended to any "" we have received.... when we give a moment to "search" who might be online, are you adamant to consider those that are within a minimal number of miles from you?

It's a Small, Small, Small, Small World out there now. As a matter of fact, was there a movie wayyyy back when with that same name? Humph..... interesting!
8 Comments
Back in the 50s....
Posted:Feb 7, 2022 12:06 pm
Last Updated:Apr 27, 2024 1:11 pm
1821 Views

Without a doubt. The very best university course I ever took was not even in my career field! Ironic! The course was of my electives to give me some "breathing space" amidst the heavily technical and all-important coursework that my curriculum demanded.

By sheer accident, when I first arrived in the state and on campus to attend "summer school" to help decrease my fall class demand.... I was quickly informed that the remaining "seats" in this particular class was unheard of and that I had better of them as this was a surprise to not having been filled by then.

It was a sociology course named Courtship & Marriage and was taught by a world-renowned expert who was blind and had to be escorted to class each day by his dog. Incredible course! The very best I ever took and in taking that course it gave me understandable pause in wondering if sociology might be a better fit for my inquisitive mind.

Anyway.... I loved the class, as did all the other students, as this professor and his several courses ranked as the most in demand courses at the university. Enough of the accolades for the professor and the course, now on to the point I am taking forever to get to.....

I did come away from this course with several very poignant facts and figures that were formative to me and my perspective towards social life. Other facts were simply neat to hear and be aware of.

Take this ..... back in the 50s, if you were to take a few block walk around the neighborhood around your family's home..... there was about a 90% chance you would pass/"See" your future intended while taking your post-supper walk.

Just think of that. Think of that as compared to how accessible the whole world is to us nowadays. In a second ....we can an e- instead of what what used to be a "snail " letter that usually took days and sometimes did not even reach it's desired destination.

Instead of a phone booth you had to stand in at the corner and pump quarters, dimes and nickels into to make a call, or a fixed dial telephone at home..... you have a high tech cell phone that can do soooo much. Phones are computers, cameras, encyclopedias, flashlights, and have a wealth of features that I do not want to even delve into as I might be forever hooked. In full disclosure, I have never had the urge to get into , , and all of the other cell social areas. My loss? I do not feel that way.

Back in the 50s, what was flight like with commercial airlines compared to what it is now?

I am certain you can add so much more about how our lives have changed year by year since we were much younger. And you ladies can certainly add to what present day improvements have done in your lives.

Now back to the point about the ability to more easily "communicate and connect" with others. Would you argue or agree that we can all use very dear friends in our lives. Hopefully we have some very dear friendships close by in our lives. Friends we see and deal with daily, often and local.

What of friendships that span a sizable distance from where we are? Away from where we "live?" What of the contacts and yes, incredible friendships that could occur if..... if we expanded our sphere of distance? Yup, I am certain that as we come into SFF as we do, and after we have attended to any "" we have received.... when we give a moment to "search" who might be online, are you adamant to consider those that are within a minimal number of miles from you?

It's a Small, Small, Small, Small World out there now. As a matter of fact, was there a movie wayyyy back when with that same name? Humph..... interesting!
0 Comments

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